Happiness in Between

Thursday, May 24, 2018

“Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be.” - Abraham Lincoln

So it's been a while. I originally started this blog for the simple reason that I love to write. Over the past two years, life just hasn't been simple. I stopped writing for the love of writing. Not because I didn't want to write, I just didn't seem to have the time to write what I wanted to write. Because I have been writing. I write for work; I write in journals to my kids, documenting their too quickly changing lives; I write grocery lists, weekend chore lists and to do lists for everything under the sun so I don't forget things, which I do now - all. the. time. 

You see in the past two years, life has changed - a lot. We've added another human to our lives (whose pregnancy came with a few challenges of its own - more on that later), my husband went back to school, and we moved out of the city and into a beautiful house in Oak Park. Somewhere along the way of all of this life change - my life changed drastically and sometimes, a lot of the time actually, it doesn't feel like my own anymore. 

I know you sign up for the whole selfless thing when you enter parenthood, I just don't think I fully appreciated just how much of my self I would be less. And to be perfectly honest, I am having a hard time figuring the whole motherhood, working and family life balance thing out. I'm trying to have it all - a family, career, and life - but in doing so, I often feel like I am doing nothing right. Motherhood has humbled me in ways I didn't know were possible. I am both thankful for and vengeful of the experience.

Which brings me back to this blog. If I can't have it all - and seriously, who can? - then I think maybe the secret is to find happiness in between the all or nothing. Finding the small moments and actions in life that we can take hold of and claim for good. Especially in a world that can seem consumed with divisiveness and hate at times. Where we're told it's this or that, never in between. Sometimes we have to consciously look for and find the positive, and if we can't find it, then we need to create it.

So, I'm back to writing on the blog and sharing the ups and downs of working motherhood, of moving out of the bustling city to a picturesque, little village, and just topics on life in general. I want to return to something that is authentically me. 

So here goes. I'm putting my thoughts back out into the universe and letting serendipity take them where it may. Thanks for reading!

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